Confess and Assess

Weight loss is a constant battle. I know that's not a news flash to most of you--it isn't to me, either-- but the past 12 months or so have been even more strugglish than usual for me on the weight loss front. Last October my weight was in the low 170s after a long stint in the 180s and I anticipated continuing the weight loss and reaching my goal weight (Weight Watchers goal: 155, personal goal: 145) in the next year.

As Sara likes to say, "Hope is not a plan," and I'm afraid I was running more on hope than finely-tuned plans. Throw in some battles with medication difficulties and changes (no, no--I'm not trying to blame all my weight problems on that, but it was a factor) and some holidays that sprang up out of nowhere (Christmas is brand spankin' new, right?), and I was on the bullet train to Chubsville in no time flat.

At first my gain was slow (there goes my bullet train analogy), but I gained momentum rapidly and by late spring I was in the 190s.

Allow me to backtrack a little: when I joined Weight Watchers in February of 2007, my starting weight was 194.5 pounds. I received my 25 pound award in August of that year.

Back to this summer. By mid July, I hit 196.5 pounds, putting me two pounds above my starting weight (WW does not currently offer an award for this). I had given away all my size 14 clothes in the previous year and not only did I need those again, I was fitting into size 16 (and even 18--curse you, Old Navy!) for the first time ever. (Hey plus size friends--I realize you're pulling out your tiny violins at this point, but too much weight isn't good for you, whether it's 50 pounds or 150 pounds, wouldn't you agree? [If you don't agree, I don't want to know.])

I guess you could say in July I was near rock bottom (though my actual bottom was far from rock-like). I don't know exactly what made me stop the weight gain, though if I ever figure it out, I'm totally bottling it and selling it on QVC. Nonetheless, I stopped gaining and lost a few pounds before kind of hovering for a while in the lowish 190s.

Ever since, I've managed to avoid returning to the habits that put me on the gain train in the past, but I haven't really committed to doing anything that will produce steady and continual weight loss. I have lost a few more pounds over the past few months, it's true, and I'm happy about that, but if it's going to stick I need to start trying harder. Effort is a beautiful thing.

I've been working long and hard on my plan. Well, actually, so far my "plan" has consisted of not resisting Sara's efforts to get me to blog about weight loss for NaBloPoMo.

I hereby promise to make a plan. A real live plan for losing weight and doing it soon. And I also promise to post this plan on this blog (this one--right here) by midnight on this coming Monday.

Here's the rundown of how things are with me, weight-loss wise and health wise right now:

*Weight: 186 (yesterday it was 185)

*Height: still 5'9"

*Exercise regimen: none

*Best thing I eat regularly: broccoli

*Worst thing I eat regularly: Arby's mozzarella sticks

*Husbands who weigh less than I do: Joel

*Nights per week I get enough sleep: one or two

*Number of aches and pains: four

*Water consumed daily: around 48-64 oz

*Measurements:

-Upper arm: 14 inches

-Neck: 14 inches (for pity's sake--why is my arm as big around as my neck? Oh yeah. Frequent fried cheese consumption).

-Bust: None of your diggity dang business

-True waist (smallest part): 34 inches

-Waist at belly button: 37 inches

-High hips (at hipbone): 43.5 inches

-Largest hip measurement: 44.5 inches

-Thigh: 27 inches

-Knee (just above kneecap): 17 inches

-Calf: 16 inches

-Ankle (why not?): 8 3/4 inches

Well, that's the scoop. The scoopity scoopy scoop.

Stay tuned for the plan.

Not only do I make Holly go along with my crazy ideas..

...but I also steal her good ones.

Today we were chatting on IM, and she said that she thought we should occasionally post some recipes. And since I was simultaneously wondering what the heck I should blog about today, I quickly agreed with her--and then tried to figure out which recipe I could post today.

It took me a little while to come up with one, since most of my favorite recipes aren't exactly, erm, appropriate for a "diet" blog. But then I remembered a fun, easy, and really good recipe I found last year that my kids and I all love.

I found it on Green Lite Bites, which is a veritable treasure-trove for healthy meals, snacks, and food ideas. Plus Holly and I both like that Roni's our height and is currently at our goal weight, so we like seeing pictures of what we may look like when we get there, too.

So here's the recipe for "Big Simple Chocolate Cupcakes." They are awesome. I highly recommend adding the sprinkles. Everybody loves sprinkles.

The only thing I do differently is that I make them in mini-muffin tins, not giant (just reduce the cooking time to more like 15 minutes). I do this mostly because I have a lot of kids. It doesn't matter if I'm using the same amount of batter to make the cupcakes--if the end result is a lot of things for them to eat as opposed to a few, they are happier. They get this from me. And also, like sprinkles, everybody loves mini cupcakes. If they say they don't, they're probably lying.

Oh, and one important thing to remember--make sure they are cooled all the way before you feed them to your children. If you don't, they will say, "Hmm...what's the deal with these?" sprinkles or no (though they'll still eat them, mind you), but if you wait they'll only know they're eating really moist chocolate cupcakes. And maybe fight about who got more sprinkles.

Hit me with your best (flu) shot

If I were one of those people who is convinced the world is out to get her, I would have a serious bone to pick with the world for the ineffectiveness of last year's flu shot. Sure, universe (or world--whatever)...I finally decide to get a flu shot for the first time in a decade and that's the year they (read: you) get the strain wrong, rendering the shot essentially useless and dooming me  and my 9-year-old to a miserable bout with the flu. Miserable! Flu! Bout! 

I want our $60 back. (Yeah--Joel never got the flu, but he could have gotten it, so I want his $20 back as well.)

But wait, I guess I'm not a world-is-out-to-get-me type person. Today I'm not, anyway. Which explains why I went to Joel's workplace today and got stabbed in the arm with a gigantic needle. (I never said I wasn't a whiner.) It also helps that it was free. 

I sincerely hope they (not sure who "they" are--the CDC? the WHO? the cast of Grey's Anatomy?) have chosen wisely this year. As much as I dislike the stabbage of a flu vaccine, I dislike the flu even more. 

I was thinking today that it would be nice if there were a vaccine for all potential diseases/ailments. And that led me to think (so much thinking today! is that a side effect of flu shots?), that while there isn't a single shot to prevent many/most of the physical afflictions that can befall us, there are things we can do, that in combination, can possibly and maybe prevent many illnesses and health problems. 

The problem is, eating a healthy diet rich in fruits and vegetables, exercising, getting enough sleep and all that good-for-you jazz involves a wee bit more of a long-term commitment than a 2-second needle jab. And, just like getting last year's flu shot, doing those things doesn't necessarily mean you won't get cancer or pneumonia or a goiter. Still, in theory, I believe those things are worth doing. It's good to minimize risk whenever you can. 

If I happen to be in a thinking mood again tomorrow, I should maybe figure out when I'm going to take my health more seriously. While getting a flu shot is a good start, it's only a start. I see a lot of exercise, healthy eating and self-discipline (oh horrors!) ahead. 

Hmmm...maybe that needle wasn't so bad? 

And you were so scared...

I'm feeling a little like Grover right now. (Quick! Name the book!)

Today's run was actually pretty darn good. It would have been pretty darn gooder if my gym's A/C had been on, but whatevs. The schedule (which I totally meant to link to in the last post and then totally forgot) called for me to run 5 minutes, walk 3, run 5, walk 3, and then run 5 more. The first 5 actually weren't all that bad. From the get-go, though, I used my towel to cover up the clock on the treadmill and just focused on the music on my iPod. The next 5 minutes was fine, too, but the last 5 was more of a struggle. About 2 minutes in I realized that no way in heck was the song that was on going to carry me for the rest of the time, so I quickly scrolled through my workout playlist (no easy feat when you're dealing with an armband whilst running, I might add), and found one of my go-to songs and made it through the rest of the run alive.

What song was it, you ask? Well, I'll tell you, I answer. It's called Is This the Way to Amarillo? Is that a country song, you ask? Why no, it's not, I answer. It's a song from the 70's, written by Neil Sedaka and sung by Tony Christie (though until I googled it, I would have sworn it was Tom Jones). Why, on earth, is this a song you even know of, let alone use as a power song while working out, you ask? Because of the greatest. reason. ever. (I answer.)

My husband forwarded me this 3 years ago, and ever since it has been a constant source of happiness to me. And because I like you so much, I hope you like it as much as I do:


Warning: contains a couple quick shots of some bums (of the naked kind, not homeless), so maybe don't watch if your mother-in-law's in the room (assuming she's anything like my mil, that is)

Ok, this time the crazy's just coming from me

I know it's nighttime in America, but here in Egypt it's morning. Specifically, it's time for me to leave to go to the gym. And--here comes the crazy--I'm a little scared. Because there are monsters at the gym. Ok, not really (I'm sure I had you going there for a minute there, didn' t I?). Because I have to run. I guess I don't have to, but I'm going to. I've been doing the Couch-to-5K running plan for the last 6 weeks, and today I start week 5 (pay no attention to the fuzzy math; I'm slow).

Week 5 means that never again on the schedule will I see a running interval shorter than 5 minutes. 5 minutes at a time is the longest I have run in my life. As far as I know, 5 minutes is my max.

Things aren't usually as bad as you anticipate them to be though, right? Well, at least gym-related things aren't anyway; I'm sure there are many things that are, but I'm not going there right now. Right now I'm going to the gym. Sigh. I'll let you know how it goes.

Craigslist: Wanted: Husband-sized heat rock

We used to be the stereotypical couple arguing over the thermostat, Joel* and I. I was always cold, he was always too hot. I'd huddle under a pile of blankets while we watched TV, he'd fan himself with the remote and eat a giant bowl of ice cream. I'd put my frozen feet on his legs in bed to try to get warm, he'd scream in terror at being awakened in such a fashion. You get the idea.

Then Joel went on a diet and something went terribly wrong (in addition to the fact that I gained weight while he lost). He's lost about 75 pounds over the past year and a half and he's still working on losing 10-20 pounds more. He's also lost his ability to regulate his body temperature, it seems. He's always cold!

Yesterday, the thermostat was set to 72 degrees. I was perfectly comfortable. And Joel was huddled on the couch, looking like this:

Look how miserable, poor thing. He's wearing two t-shirts, topped by a thermal-lined hooded sweatshirt, topped by another, greener sweatshirt. Note his hands tucked in the sleeves.

It's kind of funny, this role reversal, until I start wondering why this is happening to him. He used to produce heat (even before he got fat) like nobody's business. Now he can't get warm without going to McDonald's and climbing under the heat lamps. I wonder if he's permanently damaged his metabolism by dieting. He had his thyroid checked recently, so that can't be it.

I think he needs to go to the doctor again. ("So, patient, what can I do for you today?" "Um, I'm cold!") Meanwhile, I'll enjoy saying things like, "Well, you'll just have to put on a sweater--it's easier for you to get warm than it is for me to cool off." He may have said that to me a few times in the past.

(For the record, he was never mean about it--I'll try not to be mean either.)

Joel's mom suggested that he purchase this wearable blanket

She insists that it's a perfectly masculine item.

Uh. Sure it is!

You might notice that it's called a Snuggie. I hope he gets one, just so I can ask if his Snuggie is keeping him warm enough.

*I was going to use pseudonyms for my husband and kids in this blog, but Joel didn't like that I referred to him as "Nerd" in another post. Apparently only his brothers are allowed to call him that (there's a story behind it). I can't think of anything else, so I'm going to be lazy and use his real name...unless you think I should call him "Snuggie."

A peek inside our twisted little brains

This is the transcript of an IM conversation Holly and I had earlier this year. It made me laugh, so I saved it. The only thing I changed about it was substituting our real IM monikers for the ingenious (and virtually uncrackable) code of "H" for Holly and "S" for me.

For a little context, we had been chatting earlier about me going out to lunch with some friends at a restaurant I'd never been to before, so I had been whining to her about not knowing what to get, and this is the conversation we had after I got home. She is so lucky to be my best friend!

Anyway, please enjoy:

H [4:39 P.M.]: how was lunch?
S [4:40 P.M.]: yum-o
S [4:40 P.M.]: I got "Chicken Delight"
S [4:40 P.M.]: which is like Turkish Delight I guess
S [4:40 P.M.]: but not gross
H [4:41 P.M.]: I'm going to start calling all my dinner recipes Something Delight
H [4:41 P.M.]: Chicken Delight
H [4:41 P.M.]: Tuna Delight
S [4:41 P.M.]: lol
H [4:41 P.M.]: Ramen Delight
H [4:41 P.M.]: McDelight
S [4:41 P.M.]: Eggs Weiners and Rice Delight
H [4:41 P.M.]: yep
H [4:41 P.M.]: Get Your Own Delight
S [4:41 P.M.]: Make Your Own Dang Delight
H [4:42 P.M.]: Leave Me Alone This Chapter is Really Good Delight
S [4:42 P.M.]: I Fed You Yesterday Delight
S [4:42 P.M.]: Your Hands Ain't Broke Delight
H [4:43 P.M.]: The Toaster's Over There Delight
S [4:43 P.M.]: What Do You Think They Invented Pizza Delivery For Delight
H [4:43 P.M.]: There's No End to Mama's Lack of Interest in Your Well-Being Delight
S [4:44 P.M.]: Cry Me A River Delight
S [4:44 P.M.]: You Don't Look Like You're Starving Delight
H [4:44 P.M.]: Tell Your Dad to Get off His Butt Delight
H [4:44 P.M.]: except then
H [4:45 P.M.]: it has Butt and Delight right next to each other
H [4:45 P.M.]: and I don't think that will do
S [4:45 P.M.]: ew
S [4:45 P.M.]: and lol
S [4:45 P.M.]: How about "You Have Two Parents Y'know Delight"
H [4:46 P.M.]: That's better
H [4:46 P.M.]: not so gross
S [4:46 P.M.]: yes
S [4:46 P.M.]: not quite as funny though
H [4:47 P.M.]: no
S [4:47 P.M.]: sigh
H [4:47 P.M.]: as much as it pains me
S [4:47 P.M.]: humor isn't everything
S [4:47 P.M.]: in theory
H [4:48 P.M.]: are you quite sure?
S [4:48 P.M.]: no