What's all this?*

Blog? What blog? I have a blog?

(Next thing you'll be telling me I have a third child who I've forgotten all about. Yuh-huh--it could happen. I'm just that loopy. Once we were at Disneyland with Sara's family and I was in charge of keeping track of two of the kids. Well, eventually that responsibility had to be taken away from me and I was then put  in charge of keeping track of zero kids and just making sure I didn't get lost.)

*Please say in a British accent, preferably as if you were a chimney sweep in Mary Poppins. 

P.S. There's no point to the picture, other than I look like a complete dork and it makes me laugh. Well, maybe it is relevant. I'm 4 years old there, by the way (in case you were thinking it was taken last Tuesday).

Size: L (L is for Limbo)

When Sara was here way back in January (that seems so long ago), we went to Target. I think we were there mainly so Sara could give it (Target) a big "I miss you" hug, but we also purchased a few items. As it was still freezing cold here way back in January, Sara purchased some tights. I thought I would enjoy owning some tights also, so I picked up a package of Target tights and checked the back to see what size I should buy to fit, well, my size.

Here's what I saw:

For those of you who can't read Blurry, here's a translation (I'm near-fluent in Blurry):

4'11"-5'5" 100-130 lbs Small/Med

5'5"-5'11" 130-175 lbs Med/Tall

5'5"-5'11" 190-240 lbs 1X/2X (I'm not positive it says 240. It's 2something though)

Back in January, I weighed about 184 lbs (I'm not sure of the exact number, but I'm too lazy to look it up.)

Do you see the problem? The tights skip from 175 pounds to 190 pounds, with no size offered for those weighing between 176 lbs and 189 lbs. Yeah--those who are under 4'11" or over 5'11" and under 100 lbs or over 240 lbs are also tightsless in this situation, but at least there are specialty stores for them (or the girls' department for those under 100 lbs). What am I to do? Where's my neither-here-nor-there store? I haven't done any research since to see if all tights have similar size gaps. Now that spring is here (kinda), I have no use for tights.

And now I have a goal for this fall '09 (other than somehow acquiring several millions of dollars [which I will totally share with you--I'll at least buy you some tights]): to fall below 175 pounds so I can get me some of them fancy Target tights.

I think Hallmark can see inside my house

A few days ago I got this card in the mail from my friend that I used to go to the gym with when I lived in Southern California. She lives in Japan now, and ergo carries the title of My Only Friend That is Usually Awake at the Same Time That I Am. Because of this, we chat on Skype a few times a week. Every once and awhile we talk about how little we like exercise compared to how much we like to eat. See why we're friends? Food = awesome, exercise = necessary evil.

Anyway, I don't really have a point to this, I just really liked the card and wanted to share it with you.

Bad Idea of the Week:

Eating 1/2 a box of Trix cereal (dry) in one sitting. (Hey-- Lost makes me anxious...and munchy).



Good idea to counteract the bad idea:

Skinny Buns

Get this. (I read somewhere that the secret of successful bloggers is that they start each post with a forceful command.*) You know Carrie Fisher? The actress/writer/gold bikini-wearer? (Of course you know Carrie Fisher. Who doesn't?) I just heard from her very mouth that she was offered the role of Princess Leia in the Star Wars trilogy with the caveat that she lose 10 pounds. The thing is, at the time she weighed a mere 105 pounds. Sure, she's 5'1" tall, but that's still incredibly skinny. Shame on you, George Lucas and Star Wars casting agents!

I hate Hollywood. (Except for when they make an enjoyable film--I like that part.)

P.S. My source for this information is an NPR podcast of "Wait, Wait...Don't Tell Me" episode, which originally aired on January 31st of this year.

*I made that up. The actual secret of successful bloggers is that they tell outrageous lies.

Never Give a Half-Baked Answer to a 4-year-old

Conversation with above 4-year-old tonight, just before bed:

4-year-old (In sweet lispy 4-year-old voice): "Mommy, what does 'fat' mean?"

Me (In an absent-minded, lazy voice): "It means 'big.'"

4-year-old: "Mommy, you are very, very fat!"

Me (In a paying-attention-now voice): "Honey, many people don't like it when you call them fat. It means they are...uh...bigger than they'd like to be."

4-year-old: "Mommy you are bigger than me!" (OK. I can agree with that.)

I suppose I should have told her that "fat" means, "having too much adipose tissue." (see below). That would have cleared things right up.

P.S. I really don't have a problem with the word "fat" myself (not that I want people yelling it at me in the street), but I don't want 4-year-old to start telling anyone who is larger than she is that they are "fat."

Product Review: Wheat Thins Fiber Selects

I know you value my opinions...about everything. So based on that, I decided to sample a new food product and write about it. You're welcome!

Have you ever had Wheat Thins? Sure you have. Everyone's had Wheat Thins. 

Do you like Wheat Thins? I don't--not really, anyway. I suppose I would eat them if I were starving, or if I ran out of popcorn and there was something good on TV (is it possible not to eat while watching TV? I really need to find out.)

Still, they're not my favorite cracker. They're kind of anemic tasting. (Can something taste anemic if it doesn't have blood? What does anemia taste like, anyway? Don't tell me if you know.)

Well, in spite of my lackluster feelings about Wheat Thins, I decided to give the new Fiber Selects 5-grain version a try. It helped that I had a good coupon that made them cost $1. 

Guess what? They're tasty! I really like them. In fact, I will certainly buy them again (no, I am not on the take from Nabisco). They have a nice, nutty crunch. I like the large grains of salt on the surface. (I'm a fan of salt.)

What about nutrition, you ask? Be patient! I'm getting to that. 

Here's some of the nutrition info from the box:

1 serving=13 crackers

Per serving:

4.5 grams fat (no saturated fat) 

30% of calories are from fat

22 g carbohydrates

5 g fiber

2 g protein

What's exceptional about those numbers is the fiber gram count. 5 grams of fiber is a lot for a serving of crackers. Most crackers have little or no fiber, even those with "wheat" in the title. (Did you know that? Does it annoy you like it annoys me? Are you annoyed that I'm annoyed by  stupid things?)

For example, regular Wheat Thins have 1 gram of fiber per serving. Wheatsworth crackers (made from stone-ground wheat!) also have 1 gram of fiber per serving. Multigrain saltines have NO grams of fiber per serving. Triscuits are better than most, with 3 grams of fiber per serving (and, they are delicious)(also, never try to eat them without a drink at hand--they will always get stuck in your throat).

What's so important about fiber? Well, that's a subject for another post. I could go on and on about fiber. I love fiber. What can I say? I'm just a regular girl.